my writing pad: love

Showing posts with label love. Show all posts

Monday, April 14, 2014

Ugly Alert

I'm on a marathon of watching a drama with 133 episodes now. Currently on the 90th episode, Ugly Alert takes my korean drama watching experience up to a new level. It is not the usual plot like love triangle, evil mother/stepmother, puppy love of school students and stuffs. It shows the real hardships of life that everybody needs to struggle. It shows that even the luckiest, happiest, or wealthiest person can be sad inside and need some love to cure it. And by love,it doesn't need to be between man and woman. The love showed in this drama comes from different angles and perspectives, on of them is love towards family especially siblings. It also shows the consequences of what might happen if a person lacks of love. I'm so happy with the drama i chose because it shows maturity (not that i hate childish drama, i just need something new) and this drama gives me tones of it. Eventhough the episodes seems a lot, each and every one of it is very important to the plot expands. Cant wait to finish this drama but kinda sad too. Bittersweet.

Life is love

- chorunia -

Monday, June 13, 2011

the sweetest dream (mine!)

call me crazy call me a fool, my dream of them felt so real i classified it as a tale before i was put asleep..the sleeping part was just a condition so that i wont be too sad to see them slipping away from my arms..so when i woke up at 11.40 a.m.(i slept at 4 so this is bearable) this morning, i sigh..."oh..it was only a dream..." but it was the sweetest dream of them i've ever had. i was so determined to write this here i even scribbled some of the highlights of the dream bcz i was scared that i might forget what happened. shaking...

-the dream-

i was at the Idol Village you know the one in Invisible Youth, so i was walking at the field then slowly i saw bunch of people.THEY ARE CELEBRITIES!! then i was joining them like i was one of them, joking and laughing together..i was i bit confused but i thought in the dream "do they know me? ah nver mind..as long as i can be w them w/o feeling awkward" i think i was one of the G7 members..new member cause they always said "yah..please be considerate to the maknae" "give it up to the maknae" and all..and then, you know in every episodes there might have boys as guests right? in this dream, b2ast's dongwoon, FT island's jaejin(i screamed like crazy once i saw him in front of me), SJ's donghae and some other boys i couldnt remember..then this weird thing happened, donghae came to me and hugged me like we knew each other and that we havent met for quite some time, i hugged him back cz i knew this will nver happened again, and then one of the girl, mybe seonhwa i'm not sure said "ah..its nice if i hv boys as members too" and i was like ha? ha? ha? but suddnly my little sister alya came(from nowhere) and whispered to donghae something fishy..and he like it, idk what was it..next i was on a truck like vehicle w kara's hara resting our heads before shooting some more scenes of invisible youth, it was so natural for me that i even feel the tiredness same as her (LOL at this) suddnly, a fangirl came from nowhere w camera in her hands saw us, she went "ohmygod..are you sj's seo young and kara's hara? can i have some pictures? *CLICK CLICK CLICK* and then she ran away giggling" but then in the dream, i recalled back what the fangirl has said..SUPER JUNIOR's SEO YOUNG????????? shiiiiiittttttttt! i was one of them! its getting clearer! the only girl in sj! the new member! my heart goes dup dap dup dap dap DAP DAP DAP!! its going to explode and i'm crying silently there, maybe hara noticed i was dumbstruck like that so she hugged me and said "its okay..its okay" suddenly someone w a hoodie came near to me,when he came near me, i saw his face, its long lose sj's KIBUM!! i jumped from the truck and flew to hug him so tight! and plant a peck on his cheek.. it was my 1st hug as a sj member yawww! i asked him in one long breath "where hv u been? do u missed us? r u having fun making dramas and films? hows ur little sister (same age as me)?? u know u can always share to me ur problems right? and his tears strolled down his cheeks greedily in big lumps, i cant stand seeing him like that so i cried even harder and then he said "sshhh...its okay..i'm alright...shhhhh dont cry..." and then i realized that this is only a dream so must make it fast to see all of the boys before i woke up..i asked kibum where are the other members, he pointed at the changing/preparation room nearby that have a big "SUPER JUNIOR" sign in front of the door..we walked together towards the room hand in hand, he was smiling brightly like he was about to deliver a real big surprise to the boys..when i first walked in, the previously noisy room turned to a pin drop silent situation..everybody was looking at me w an astonished reaction,oh i can still remember them,,then shindong came to me and said "we missed you so much baby" and i replied w tears strolling down my cheeks "i missed you too" and hugged him,then i went to hug leeteuk(the leader), he jz smiled, his smile was so beatiful i cried again and said "sorry to make you worried so much, the invisible youth production didnt let me go home these 2 weeks" i dont know from where i got that idea but maybe its true LOL like maybe i hv to finish up recording all the episodes of the season before i'm allowed to go home..right? then i saw hangeng and waved to him (oh we're awkward even in the dream, i smiled) and then i saw heechul from the back (he sit backing me up,err how to say) at the corner of the room, listening to songs form his ipod, isolating himself as usual not knowing i'm back..so i went towards him and hugged him from his back..at first he was like surprised then maybe jz maybe bcz of the familiar scent of me, he glanced to the side where my face was at, smiled, and bite my right cheek! "ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!! HEECHUL OPPA!!" i screamed..he laughed hard at the bite mark..oh heechul~i'm all teary again..then i went to hug sungmin w his cute pink checked shirt n thats when i saw him..my prince..(oh my god i'm literally teary right now) he jz came in the door w yesung and ryeowook at his sides..shocked but smiling that evilish cute smile while walking towards me,i was nervous,flustered, and every emotions in the world just run into my body kicking every organs in it real hard, i swear i was about to faint(lol in a dream) when he catched me and hugged me , "i missed you so much honey" he said half whispering and give me the sweetest softest most beatiful kiss on my lips. it was jz in-a-blink-of-an-eye moment bt i closed my eyes and hold his hands tight to cherish the moment cz i know this dream will stop any moment now. then yesung came from kyuhyun's back and gv him a knock on his head hard "stop it you fool! we missed her too!" we burst into a big laugh..hahahah!! then i saw kangin at the other side of the room smiling at me and suddenly "nur! bangunlah! dah nak pukul 12 jap lagi ibu balik!" my big brother yelled, i tried to continue the dream but i kept hearing the sounds of my brother's steps besides me..huh..so i decided to wake up,write some draft about what really happened, and do this post..this is not something to brag about, just want to keep the memory safely here and will never be lost..the things that i regretted from this dream are i failed to look for each of the members and tell them how much i missed and love them. i'm so sorry siwon n eunhyuk for not seeing both of u in the dream at all, sorry to ryeowook, yesung, and kangin i didnt make it to hug and say i love you..sorry to hangeng i was awkward to you even in the dream bt i want you to know i love you just as much as the others.. and sorry to my love cho kyuhyun, sorry you appeared in my dream right before it finished, i'm sorry boys...i'm glad you guys accepted me to be one of the member of Super Junior even it was only in a dream...

Monday, May 9, 2011

i can do this!

just few more freaking days before the time disappear, vanished as thin air..so i must work hard! play less! focus more! pray for me friends..i'm in desperate need,thank you in advance

p/s: this picture made my day..happy mother's day : )

especially to ibu dearest, you know i love you so mucho mucho!

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

lonely

he is so lonely...he wrote things like this on his twitter..

"Sometimes, it's easier to think that there is no one around me. Whether it be a fan or a friend.. Maybe it's better to have pain in a place where you love rather than have hatred in a place where you are loved.. In the end, you are alone even if you live and you are still alone if you die. Since long time ago, I've been thinking that I have been deserted. Now, thinking that I have to make it as it goes is. " .

Source: Heechul Twitter

Translated by Minnie @ SUJUISM.BLOGSPOT.COM

its funny you know, when we really love our favorite artists to the point that we think we can feel their pain but feel completely hopeless when it comes to how can we help them,i cant do much and thats sadden shit out of me, i love them so much..i never love artists as much as this. be strong heechul shii..be strong boys..be strong Super Junior..ELFs will always be there for you..watching you from far if you really want to be alone..saranghamnida :')

Sunday, April 17, 2011

giving up

i don't know why but i think this picture is so sweet.

even my friends agreed with this statement.

they look so compatible together.

they are very cute right?

can be the next WGM couple.

hihihi >_<

just think about it

kyunur couple..

awwww~

my friend said i deserve better. she said i have to take care of my heart

i'm trying very hard right now.

seriously..

okay i don't want to sound desperado here

so i'd take a stand,

i'll quit

i'll give more chance to myself

i'll not restrict myself

i'll find somebody else worth it

the one that will accept me

...

(distraction1 : cf about Bieber boy)

oh justin bieber, baby you are so sweet..

i wish i'm younger so that it'll not be too embarrassing

fangirling head over heal for you hehe

=DD

so i made my decision,

i'll clear up my mind, build some barrier

for this 'so called' feeling..

so that we can be normal friends

but not strangers,

and live happily :)

since you already found someone..

i too will start looking hehe

dont worry, i'll be fine..

i'd made my mind, remember? :D

ayah give me a brilliant idea about writing.

this is his example of story:

a girl, say a teenage girl age maybe 12 or 13

(base on my truth story handling my sister..and myself of course)

np: Super Junior K.R.Y - Fly

(distraction2)

so the idea is, write about what this teenage feel, face, and etc..

in a fun n interesting way.

targeted readers: around that age also..

hihi

...

i love the idea, but the fact that i'm not a writer

bugged me.

i feel this very interesting..

okay i tell you what,

what if i give it a try?

sounds good!

i dont know..............what do you think?

Thursday, April 14, 2011

mushroom garden

hello readers..i know..its been a while..but i really2 am busy with my studies now, the last semester before going to practicum, hectic but i love the discipline. i'm having this idea to write this at this place called *title of the post* haha

the reason why i'm dying to write now is you know when you are really annoyed with a person, you tend to forget that you are a human. sounds mean..but hey, thats how i feel now..pretty much boiled up to head..i dont know for others, but for me, its quite pathetic for a girl to behave like that with a group of boys. that just not right. professionally and ethically...please lah..we were in a class, behave like one. i dont give a sh*t if you want to show your so called 'affections' towards the boys OUTSIDE the class but in the class? where everyone can see you? thats just how it eeeeeuuuuwwww me like h*ll! i know..i know..you are a bright student with result i never had but that doesnt mean u dont need the knowledge..OR if you really think you dont need the knowledge, can you please consider other people? people who really want to have that knowledge to at least dream to have result as yours..*sigh*

okay...so you n I both are in awkward period or what? i cant stand this you know..i really2 want everything to be as normal as it can be, if you can act like a normal person towards her..why cant i act normal towards you? the thing is here now..you are acting like an alien towards me, how am i suppose to cope with that? its been 3 weeks you know, since you last talked with me in a normal way..is it because of that 4496 seconds of talk time? if it is because of that than dont you ever think about that night anymore..i just want the old you, who are not awkward and shy or something shitty like that..i dont like it. it makes me feel far from you..please..act the normal you towards me..i miss you :'(

okay so i felt so much more relieved now than before..thanks blog..i owe you one..now i must continue my life..thanks guys..

Friday, March 4, 2011

to be or not to be...

mood: none

have you ever heard of a book called 'the exchange'?

well, i'd finish reading the book recently,

its about a teenage boy who had lost his parents because of a car accident.

he is an addicted reader, you know what i mean?

he likes to read story books, no matter what story..it can be anything..

it can be a pirates fighting with a six-legged platypus,

a fairy princess who is on the road to find her true love(sounds cheesy right)

a battle between 2 kingdoms that results to be an epic war

wizards and witchcraft, full of chants and spells

seriously

it can be everything.

as long as it is a story, fictional one.

but he sucks in writing, people said the more you read, the more you ca

n write.

but he found out that he cant write, he'd try to write..but nothing came out from his mind to the paper. so he decided. he classify himself to be

a reader, not a writer.

the thing i like about the boy is, i think i have the same problem with him.

i like reading books, story books, biography, autobiography, history, literature,

you name it.

i'd once tried to write. a so-called love story

but i found out i dont have a proper ending for it.

so i left it unfinished half done.

i suppose i have to stick to be only a reader.

i feel excellent being one.

*now playing: Super Junior-Marry You

i know, you never see me as a girl, a girl you'd be attracted to

you be friend with me because

i'm a good listener,you can easily share things with me

but

do you know that i only be a good listener

to whom i love? and care?

you didn't know right..i guess u'll never know..

and whats that suppose to mean ainur?

are you saying here, you love him?

cut that crap sweetheart, you'll hurt yourself.

i'll listen to my mind..

but what about my heart?

i pity her, i always ignore her,

sometimes i feel guilty..but this is for her own good.

ah~

never mind..being friend is more than enough

as long as theres reasons to talk to him

cheesy much lah ainur..

hihihi

*now playing: Super Junior-Shining Star

oh its freaking 15 days to go!!!!!

my true loves are coming to Malaysia!

boys...embrace me, kiss me, surround me,fill me in with lots of your love

the 13 or at least 10 of you

and makes me happy that day, ok?

especially you, Cho Kyuhyun :)

Friday, February 18, 2011

tomorrow

hopefully everything will be alright,

i'll be praying hard,

keeping my finger cross for anything bad to happen.

tomorrow is the key to my dream and its all depending on my buddy elly.

i wish you good luck and all the best

may our dream comes true

cant wait cant wait!

oh warning peeps, i might be bragging about something

real soon..

clue?

SS3!

Thursday, February 17, 2011

yayy! I found another Mr.Cho

hihihi..hi there!

i promise this will be a short post.

i know i'm way too late to like this guy, but he is so cute i cant help it ;)

people, meet John Cho

(he's super cute right? hehe)

a Korean-American, who is an actor

(hey, Flash Forward series, remember?)

[oh yeah, Harold and Kumar...ppffftt~]

and much more of course~

isnt he cute? (>.<)

eventhough he is quite 'aged' for me

(man! he's 39 this year!)

i dont care! he's cute and he's Cho! hehe :D

but sadly, he's married to a pretty Japanese-American

and had a son :(

lets not fret ainur.. you still have your Cho Kyuhyun

he will soon be...

Korean-Malaysian

yawww!

(pardon for the delusional me peeps, i'm a girl)

L.O.L!!!

okay enough, till then, bye!

note: these pictures are not mine, they are taken from the Google image search engine.

Thursday, February 10, 2011

love hunting

okay people, i'm so bored today i should have agree with arifah

to go to time square today.

screw me..ungrateful child!

haih~ there, i did it again..its not like i dont have homework to do

or what

but i really dont have the mood to do it..not today..

waaaa~

how nice...

shopping, maybe watching movie and all

the problem here is not like i dont want to go out,

but when we go out we tend to spend money

but i have to count every penny to be sacrificed

because i really want to go to that

concert..

hhhmmm..just forget about it ainur..

this is for the sake of the boys..

patience is all you need :)

another lame post i know..

p/s: i really really really want to hunt, but i know i'm not fully equipped

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

had my eyes wide open, why would they open?

oh this is just a random picture of the match

*the thorn among the roses, The Blues among The Reds*

well you know problems will never run out of ideas on how to be problematic.

they are just too absorbed with what they are doing.

i supposed if they are tired of being a problem,

then they will become more like a helper...

oh lame lah ainur~

bla bla bla

oh ya people, i have something to brag about here

*not that anyone ever read my blog, but who cares*

i got A- for my micro teaching practice man~

HOW COOL IS THAT? ^0^

hahahaha!

i'm so proud of myself

(and my group mates of course,without them i'm nothing)

seriously people..

do you know how hard to plan a lesson plan?

it is so hard that we felt very dry,used,tired, exhausted,

after finished planning ONE lesson plan

and and and..

not to mention controlling a class full of

a bunch of young adult pretending to be standard 4 students

hah~

i'm just thankful it when out well

hmm..oh! i really really really really really

want to go

that concert!

SUPER JUNIOR SS3 LIVE IN KUALA LUMPUR, MALAYSIA

19th March 2011

being in this beautiful sapphire blue sea

holding banners, light sticks, and dream

ah~my dream

a once in a life time dream

my life.

please strength..

please be strong enough

i'm begging you

please do whatever it takes

to fulfill this lifetime mission

i promise you i wont ask for any other thing this year

hopefully my dream will come true

ameeen~

i really have to sleep now

but i really cant put my eyes shut

yeah yeah

i'm trying right now

bye.

Sunday, January 30, 2011

autumn in my heart

yes..this is the feeling i'm having now..so bright, so breezy, so light..i'm not good at this but i can feel it..i can feel the emotion and the mood..i know..its quite pathetic for me to feel this way but i cant help it..i'm so happy i can smile in my sleep..yes people..i'm so in love..i'm in love with him..oh this is so cheesy..not that he loves me back..but who cares..can i at least be happy of what he had done for me tonight? oh i didn't tell you right? he sang for me..yes..got it? he did sing for me..you tell me,how on earth a girl NOT be falling head over heals when a boy sing for her? oh the sweetest song ever..the truth is, i still like him..and when he did things like this i cant help but to fall even more for him..can i? can i? i know everything about that girl but i really cant stop my feeling towards him..its like,the more i tried,the more it wont leave my heart..

this is the lyrics of the song:

-It's hard for me to say "Thanks" or "Bye" to You

All I can say to you is "Thank You" or "Thanks so much"

eveything is brand new to me, so I'm a little unsure

How should I say it? It's still really awkward

Even today, I worry about it

Hopefully we'll be able to have a "Banmal Relationship"

even though its stil kind of awkward

rather than saying "gomawoyo" (thank you)

let me hear more intimate words

We can have a "Banmal Relationship"

one step at a time, slowly walk closer

look at me in the eye

can you tell me "I love You"

its hard being a secret admirer...

thanks for the song chingu, gomawo =)

and btw, this song is from yonghwa and seohyun, wgm couple~

Sunday, January 16, 2011

sleep talking

"my mind is so full right now that i don't even realize i was doing all these silly things..i mean, what did i think? how can i be that foolish? am i that stupid? oh please..."

>i should be hitting the sack now..sleeping, dozing over..but instead, i'm here..i couldn't shut my eyes close as i saw tons of awaiting problems as soon as i closed them..well not problems..things in life that need to be solve..oh i'm so miserable now..what am i suppose to do? is this worrying over unnecessary things like one of my lecturer always said? i don't think so...i think i'm definitely worrying over certainly necessary important things..things that make my life..they are what people live for..what people need in their life..their soul nourisher..its not love i'm talking about here..its many things all of you disregard because of love..

>and you! i don't give a damn about what you are thinking of her! i don't like you like i did before..you pathetic little loser! i wish you can read this, loser! now my hatred isn't for her anymore but more to that annoying fuzzy feelings towards you..you sore loser! clever me huh? i can control myself..you thought me fool! set a barrier, remember? thanks by the way

>"sometimes..just sometimes, i can be so sickly annoyed by the people i love the most..not necessarily a guy, it can be family or friends"

>please.....i'm so tired right now...

Sunday, November 28, 2010

you'll never walk alone guys..

good luck guys..i always have faith in my team..

bury them!

and sayangku torres..please give me good goals okay?

ynwaxoxo :)

so what, if i shed blood tears?!

huhuhuhu :'(

so what, if he asked for only my phone number and not others..

so what, if he said i'm his best friend..

so what, if he treats me well..

so what, if he talks to me more than he talks to any of my girl friends..

so what, if he smiles the sweetest smile to me when we met..

so what, if i'm feeling the rushing flush of blood pumping to my face when we talk even a simple talk..

so what, if he cares for me..

so what, if he waves to me so wholeheartedly when we said goodbye..

so what, if he makes me feel comfortable talking about anything with him..

so what, if suddenly i know he likes that other girl..

so what, if he already told me about his feelings toward that girl..

so what, if i feel pain in my chest when he told me how much he likes that other girl..

so what, if he ever found out about my feelings..

so what, if i love him..

so what, if i miss him..

so what, if he might not even care..

so what, if i'm hurt bad enough i might cry my lungs out..

so what, if i sound so pathetic here..

so what, if i'm confuse with this relationship..

so what, if i'm the only one who are confuse with this relationship..

so what, if i want it to be more than just friends..

so what? so what? so what?

= i really don't know and it doesn't matter :'(

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

aren't they look like dolls?

so beautiful...

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

my darling and my sweethearts ♥

ok this post is especially made

because i cant sleep

*laugh*

this is me :)

this is my darling

CHO KYUHYUN

cant wait to see you next year!

♥ kyuhyun oppa saranghaeo ♥

and of course

all of you dear ♥

♥teukie oppa♥ heechul oppa♥ siwon oppa♥ yesung oppa♥ shindong oppa♥

♥sungmin oppa♥ donghae oppa♥ wookie oppa♥

♥hankyung oppa♥ kibum oppa♥ kangin oppa♥

cant wait! cant wait! ;)

Friday, October 15, 2010

this doesn't need a day you know =)

date: 15th October

venue: anytime, anywhere

dear elly,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU..

though you are not reading this, i just want you to know how lucky i am to have you as a friend, a sister, a pal, my BUDDY.i love you and always will do.

take good care of yourself and always be happy.